Thursday, February 23, 2012

My Breaking Point

There comes a time in every spouse and active duty soldier's life where they reach their breaking point with the military.  There are times when the stress becomes so overwhelming, with not only life, but life situations directly made worse by the Army.  Tonight was my breaking point.

I want to kick something.  I want to punch a wall.  I want to scream at the top of my lungs.  I am sick of the Army.

A rant will not solve the problem, but I do want to put it out there so all of those that have not encountered similar situations will know that they do exist.  If you are new to the Army you will see that life isn't always peachy-keen... of course, you should know that already.

When we were stationed in Georgia, life was terrible.  My husband would come home every single night completely overwhelmed with frustration about the way he was being treated, how condescending his superiors were to him, etc., etc..

Then we got orders for Germany... if you look back at my posts from this time you would be able to tell how utterly excited we were.  We thought we had hit the jackpot.  Before we even knew that we were leaving we had heard rumors about a possible deployment this coming June, but nothing was official.  We understood, knew that it would happen eventually, and were ready to face the facts.

Upon arrival of Germany life was pretty good, Matthew was fitting in with his new unit, I was making lots of friends, we had received word that people would only be deploying for 6 months rather than a full year and not everyone was going to go.  Everything slowly started going downhill and about a week or so, shit hit the fan (pardon my French).

My husband came home and said he would be entering the field.  Fine... understandable... expected.  My husband is entering the field 3 weeks earlier than everyone else and staying 10 days later than everyone else... to guard gates... Really???  Okay... fine...  When the dates come out, his field time is actually overlapping with our "block leave" that is supposed to allow us vacation time before he "might" deploy.  Fine... whatever... we'll just reschedule our Italy trip.

My husband is supposed to leave for the field this Monday, we are leaving for a couples retreat tomorrow morning with the Chaplin.  As of 2000 Thursday night we still have not been told A) When I need to drop him off   B) Where I need to drop him off  C) His packing list.  We won't be coming home until very late Sunday night and he can't even pack before we leave????

Tonight we went to a FRG meeting.  Three weeks ago they were supposed to put out a list for who will be deploying and when.  We have yet to see a list.  Tonight the commander basically said that if you are in this unit... you are deploying with the rare exception to the rear detachment group.  Okay... Fine.  We had been saying that it's okay if he deploys, even for a full year because by the time he comes back we'll still have almost 2 years to enjoy Europe.  Not anymore...

Our unit is ending... Completely...  90 days after the boys (and girls) return from Afghanistan we will have to PCS.   My poor husband... We get here and it's nothing but staff duty, training, field duty, and deployment and then they kick us out.

One of the things that erks me is... WE JUST MOVED HERE!  The unit was just assembled literally months ago.  While my husband is gone in Afghanistan, not only am I going to have to be dealing with deployment but I'll also be having to plan another PCS back overseas!  Some people will stay in Europe, but essentially the most of us will get shipped back to the states.  So much for enjoying Europe.  I feel terrible that although I might still get a chance to see some things while he's gone, my husband will be left out completely.

It feels like the Army is intentionally piling things on as high as they can go to see when we'll break.

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